It's like you're choking
A chest pain
Heavy, like a ton of stone on your chest
You can't catch your breath
You try, but It wont happen
The heart beats so hard, but not in it's normal rhythm, it's more like a regular
boom, boom, boom..
You can feel it all through your body,
There's tension, you can't relax
Everything scares you, even the slightest noise makes you jump, cus you are frighten to death... even thou you don't know why!
Boom, boom, boom...
Concentrating is impossible, the weight is too heavy and the heart beats too loud
You try to concentrate on other things, but your mind slips back, back into the darkness, into what you can't explain
Boom, Boom, Boom...
The memories makes you want to cry
but you can't... cus you concentrate on breating, on smiling, on giving them what they expect; a smile, being funny, acting stupid or listening to their stories...
But all you want to do is go away... just disappear..
It's heavy
It's constant
It's something I wish for no one else to ever experience
It's anxiety
... for some they work, for me they didn't...
I try to smile n laugh, as on the photo... it's mostly a way to try to convince my brain I'm happy...
Boom, Boom, Boom...
Hopefully that works
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