Saturday

Calm wake up this morning. Only one wake up during the night at 6 and then she slept another 3h.

Amazing I am rested!

Now memos friend from work is here to lower the crib - so Sophia doesn't fall out now that she started rolling and all.

Here's a photo of me when I was 3 months and Sophia when now that she is 3 months

Puss

Short update

you realize just how sleep deprived you are when you are waiting for the aspirin to kick in realising it's stilk on the table!

Hands

Since Sophia discovered her hands a week or two ago she's in love.
If they're not in her mouth she's staring at them.

Ay Sophia...

Proud

Sometimes it hits me just how much I love Sophia.
It is not when she's crying for no reason, drops the pacifier in the middle of the night or when she has a temper tantrum in the car - but all those other times. Especially when she's asleep, so calm and peaceful.

She's amazing my little Sophia.
It's awesome "talking" to her, seeing her develop a personality and reaching her milestones, if not on time, too early.

I wish all the people I love could meet her.
We're off to Panama next week, and Sweden in the summer. So I hope she will be able to meet a few of you - you should know who you are.

I am sure you will fall in love with her just the way I and memo did.

As a side note - I am SO grateful to Memo's mom who is helping me out with Sophia, getting her the right treatment for her skin rash, summer clothes and just let her hear someone speak Spanish.

Even more mejor

So my "fake" medicine seems to work quite well.
4 times a day i should eat 10 small pieces of sugar.
Have done it for about 48 hours now and I can feel a difference, or at least I think so.

So both Sophia and I's healths are improving.

Memo and Sophia are down for their naps and I can't other than enjoy a bit of alone time.

I already ironed, cleaned the floor, dishes, kitchen... Until little miss sunshine wakes up I am without work.

Silence

Have a great night

Mejor

Sophia's rash is looking better today. We got some special cream yesterday and it seems to be working.

She's playing in the babygym now, talking to the octopus.

As a small comment to my previous post.
I just wish I was taken into consideration when decisions were taken. Would I be in touch with, meet up with or (as is now) want to take Sophia to meet a person that has tried to take me from memo, who is the cause of all problems or who memo feels uncomfortable with. No I wouldn't.
I guess i expected the same back.

Puss

Come on...

Argg... days like this I wish I had friends around I could go talk to. I need to get the frustration out, but at the moment there's no one - so I will let a bit of it out here.

Why on earth, when we had decided to forget the past, put the rings back on, and move forward is the *pute* back in our lives?

I do not understand why there is a need to have her around, to meet up with her, and even less for Sophia and I to meet her.

She destroyed our relationship, wanted to take a dad away from his baby, made him lie and deceive.
Why is he still "looking" for her?

I mean, come on.

But there's not much more for me to do than to sit on the side and watch. I don't believe in forbidding - but every action has a consequence.

There's only one reason I would continue even if I have this bad a feeling about it - Sophia.

 ay ay ay....

Disappointed

A rash

Sophia has got some kinda rash almost all over her body.
I haven't eaten anything different, nor do I think memos mom changed detergent.
The only thing different we have done is to add a few drops of baby oil into her bath. It's Nivea and it's "hyperalergenico" thus should not give her a reaction. Oh well, I didnt use it yesterday so we'll see if it gets better.

Puss

Updates and stuff

So, as I said yesterday a virus of some sort attacked my ear. I now have crappy hearing.
There is a risk that it stays like this forever, but there is a chance that I can get my hearing back with the right medication.

The right medication is of course not compatible withy breastfeeding. If I start taking it I need to stop feeding Sophia for 9 days.
If I would want to continue feeding her after these 9 days I would need to pump milk in order to keep the milk production going.

Pros/Cons

Pros: I would get perfect hearing back

Cons: pumping takes time for me, my boobs aren't pump friendly. I get out maybe 30ml pumping for 45 min, while Sophia eats maybe 150-200ml EACH time she eats, which is like 7-8 times a day.
So in order for me to keep my production up, in order for Sophia to get enough food I would pretty much need to pump 24/7.
On top of that formula kinda sucks for babies bellies, they get constipated and are not happy when they need to do nr 2.
Moreover, as it is right now Memo can't help me out with Sophia (yesterday he spent a total of 45 min with her, 20 sleeping), and I do NOT have the energy to deal with a baby in pain, while heating water to the right temperature, shake the bottle.

So, I have decided not to take those pills. I am taking some
Homeo- I don't know what pills to see of it works.

Anywho, not only did Sophia find her hands last week, buy today she turned around from belly to back! Yay

Puss

Short update

the spice my mom brought me from sweden. this sucks!

Virus

Who knew that the reason I hear as crappy as an 80 year old man is because I have a virus in my ear.

Did you know there were viruses for ears?
I did not.
Nor did I know it would make my hearing this bad.
The way mu hear can be describes as: if you hold your ear - like if you don't want to hear something - like that.
Super weird and uncomfortable.

Now I am off to buy some coke.
I need it to make me happier.

Puss

Life 2.0

The weekend was long and consisted of many things I wish wouldn't have happened or been said.

We have decided for a new fresh start - without the past and all that was done and said in it. We will see where it takes us.

Sophia deserves it.

The pictures below is of a sleep deprived me on a Monday morning in our couch.
If you would have asked me a year ago if I thought I would be sitting here, this tired, for the reasons that are and with pictures of "us" behind me I would have smiles and thought you were crazy.

Despite everything I am happy this Monday morning and am looking forward to a new beginning.

Oh, btw... We went to take pictures in a studio yesterday. Awesome.

Puss

Motherhood

Before you start thinking about raising babies and being pregnant, you might sometimes imagine how that life would be. However you are imagining it - it's wrong!

Even when I realised that I was pregnant it was difficult to imagine life with Sophia. At first I focused on getting through the days being pregnant - which isn't always easy. And getting closer to the due date, I started focusing more on the actual delivery. Of course we tried to prepare ourselves mentally and materially as good as possible for her arrival, but it is impossible.

7 weeks

I already told you my birth story (here). This is my perception about the first 2 and a half months with a tiny human.

First if all, calm down.

The first few weeks, even month is not near as bad as the other women are telling you. What "they" told me was - if I was tired now (read then) I should wait and see how it would be when she arrived (so, now)- it would (was supposed to) get worse.
It sounded like I would never be able to sleep again, and I somehow tried to make peace with that idea. Maybe Sophia is a wonder child (which I doubt), but the beginning was calm.
I got to rest, relax and sleep.
A friend of mine said, the beginning is like the honeymoon period.
It's like nature is set up in the way that, after the lack of sleep from the pregnancy (oh yeah, sleeping while being preggers sucks) you get to catch up since newborns can't do shit.

When they tell you newborns only sleep-eat-poop (in that order) it's true!
And they sleep ALL the time!
Don't worry about playtime, tummy time, milestones etc. The first few weeks the baby only "is".
We bought toys for Sophia. After maybe 3 weeks she started really appreciating her mobile. This was the only "toy" that was useful until maybe she was around 1 and a half, then she started liking the baby gym, and her "hanging toys". And so far that's it. It's not more complicated than that.
Otherwise we dance with her, it's supposed to develop her rythmics - she's not showing that she Likes it. We also sing and read books - same here, we don't really notice that she likes that in particular - it could just be that she smiles at us. She likes the lamps, walls and ceiling as much as certain toys. In the end, your baby loves to look and listen to you, babies need love, no more is needed (at first).

Baby care in general is rather simple. In the end a diaper is a diaper, it doesn't take long to learn how to change it. And baby poop - at least if you breast feed - is not that disgusting. It's like american mustard - Yellow - sometimes a bit grainy, sometimes not. And if you breastfeed your little one, it is very rare they have a belly problem. So you do not need to worry about stomachaches.
Although, breastfeeding isn't easy. At first it's a bit painful (a lot even), on top of that you are stressed it wont work, is the baby getting enough milk etc. The first two weeks are the most important, but also the most difficult ones.
When you read about breastfeeding it sounds easy - it's not a walk in the park for everyone.
I was lucky enough for everything to work out - even if we started with the pacifier when she was only 48h old (a big no no). Sadly I can't pump out that much, which kinda sucks since it would give us milk so that Memo could feed her, or maybe getting a baby sitter!
Giving a bath is also something you get a hang of quite fast - just remember always to be careful!
I always tell Memo: if she's 10 times smaller than you, then you need to be at least 10 times more careful with her!

Birth - Now

Oh, not knowing how relevant it is outside of Mexico. But here you can choose if you want a c-section or not. I know that this is NOT possible in Sweden.
In Mexico 80% chooses c-section, why?
If you ask them, they all have a medical reason. If you look at the statistics of Sweden, where you can only get a c-section for medical reasons the percentage is 80-90% natural birth.
Giving birth is painful. But it is better both for the mother and the baby.
If you are afraid of the pain, get a doula (helps with the pain), or get an epidural.
I wanted to do it without getting the epidural, but it wasn't possible - I was almost sent to do a c-section.
And even if it is painful, the pain goes away.
For me all pain was gone as soon as Sophia was on my belly. I didn't feel the placenta coming out, nor after-contractions.
(I know it's pretty wrong to say this, but she was not a pretty sight at first. New borns are a bit ugly. Although I didn't think so at the time)
The next day it was a bit painful walking, sitting down, sitting up - you get the idea.
But it passes within about a week. And it is bearable - not bad at all actually!
Just stay in bed and rest - which I didn't do. If you get a c-section you can't even carry your new baby.
REMEMBER - do your exercises (if you are preggers you know which I mean), and start before the baby arrives. Otherwise you will need to run to the bathroom as soon as you feel a teeny tiny bit that you need to pee.
Conclusion : Choose natural birth. It's better for you, the baby, plus you recover way faster than with a c-section.

When it comes to clothes. Ohhhh - I love clothes.
So we have A LOT of clothes for Sophia. The only thing I have to say here is - use your logic and good reasoning when you dress the baby.
Just because your mom or grandmother tells you the baby needs to dress like an eskimo when it's 25c outside, doesn't mean you have to.
In this post you can find how to dress a baby - according to pediatricians. A good tip is to make sure to have enough clothes and pj's cleaned, you never know what will happen during the day.

The past week or so I have started thinking about routines.
We haven't had any except for the night time.
Since she was totally new, we have had the same one:

*Bath time.
*Story time.
*Lullaby time.

Before we started at 10(22) when Memo came home from University. But since Friday I have started at 9(21) already. She's tired and it is difficult justifying keeping her up an hour longer when obviously she is exhausted.
Sophia slept in our bed the first month - mostly because I was lazy with the feeding.
I then moved her over to her travel bed that I put just next to ours.
When I noticed she wasn't eating more than once-twice a night (around her 8th week birthday) I moved her into her own room. She sleeps very good in there.
It is easy putting her to sleep. I do the routine, say "shyy" a few times, stroke her forehead and leave. Sometimes I need to go in and put the pacifier back, but otherwise she falls asleep by her self.

Nap routines are non-existent, same goes with feeding. But I have promised myself to start this week.
I can see a bit of a pattern in her natural behavior so it shouldn't be too difficult. Before she came I didn't realize she would hate sleeping so much. I mean, I love to sleep. But this little rugrat pulls her hair, scratches her eyes, and tries to kick, who knows what, in the air. Every nap is a fight, not night time though - pretty weird.

Other than that, we went out with Sophia already the next day. Not many people touched her, but otherwise I haven't noticed she felt bad, nor did she get sick. On the contrary, I believe it has made her immune system stronger. Same goes, if she drops her pacifier we clean it by either Memo or I sucking on it. As long as we're not sick recent medical research shows it makes babies less prone to get allergies and asthma.

A day with Sophia

We wake up at 10ish
We play for a bit, she eats
She naps after an hour and a half from waking up
She sleeps an hour or so
Wakes up, eats, poops (always when I talk to my mom), we play
After maybe 2h she starts getting tired again
Nap
Play, eat
.... You get the idea

Life with Sophia is getting more and more fun as she develops. She's talking a lot more, smiling when she sees me, more aware of what's going on. And I've heard it only gets better.

I love her

A sunday

Today Sophia and I started the day as a real Sunday should be started - although it's Friday.

We have slept, because we deserved to sleep.

I am now sterilising the pacifiers, and should soon be heading to the store.

I finally finished that post. It will be up tomorrow

Puss

Lifes evil twist

5 years ago I was working.
I don't remember why but I went into the closet where I kept my purse to check my phone and saw I had miss calls from my dad - weird I thought and called him.

He asked why I hadnt answered my phone - my mom wanted me to get in touch with me ( I lived in Paris at the time).

I called my moms house in Sweden and my sister answered. She couldn't tell me what was up but I should call my grandmothers house.

My mom answered.
I asked what was up.
"Lotta har dött"
I didn't get it, how could my mom's younger sister have passed away.
To this day it is the most shocking phone call I have ever received.

I got to leave work early and remember going home to see if I had any pictures of her. I did.
I remember thinking about the last time I saw her.
I cried a lot.
Didn't understand.

Sometimes life isn't fair.

Seeing my grandmother at Lottas funeral is something I wish I could erase from my mind.

Now she is gone too, it's been almost 4 years.

I miss them both. But I know that they are taking care of grandpa, making sure all is good.

I wish they could meet Sophia.

Jag saknar dig Lotta, och dej med mormor

Outfits

We're already on our fifth outfit of today.

Why?
Poop

Here are four of them!

Passport

Sophia is now the proud owner of a Mexican passport. She (and I) couldn't be happier.
Memo's mom helped which was awesome! Thank you to her.

Now it's sandwich time!

Early birds

Mañana we gotta wake up well before humans are programmed to. At like 5ish the alarm is set.

Do I need to point out that I am not excited?

This is due to Memo having to be present when we make the passport.

I am already thinking about what to do for lunch, anyone who can suggest something?

Puss

Short update

While the princess is sleeping I am writing on a post for the blog that most likely will be posted tomorrow. News of today, no passport was made, we got to go back in the morning. Also, the other day I told you I got hooked on "draw something", I am as hooked to "instagram". It's fun! later

Short update

In bed listening to Sophia sleeping

Sophia´s moods

The weekend was nice and long - a whole extra day actually!

We did nothing special. Thought we would go to Chapala, but Memo didn´t want to. 

We started playing "Draw something" on the Ipad/Iphone - it´s awesome!

All of you with smartphones (not bb) get it, it´s free - and if you already have it, let´s play! 

Find me through with the app through fb.

Today I am tired - Sophia´s sleep was a bit iffy over the weekend. Better last night, but I am still tired.

Today I we with Memo´s mom. There´s something wrong with my right ear. She gave me a spray and we´ll see in 3 days if it helps.

Always nice to meet someone I can talk to! 

Tomorrow we´re spending the day with her again, it´s passport time! YAY

Now I will start with lunch - Swedish tacos mums mums

Puss

Short update

Someone's tired

Special

The weekends are always special because Memo is home.
Today is an exception - a job interview.
So Sophia and I do the same thing as always. Sit on the couch.
She´s napping in my arms - half dressed - and I am still in pj´s.

have a great one

puss

F day

So, back to Friday.

Just got back from the park - walked the 5 km again - not at noon this time thou, at 11.40 (:
About just as stupid.
I am red as a tomato, but Sophia seems fine.
Had a freerider with me for about 3km. A fly that just sat there on the stroller, looking for - I don´t know what.

Trying to gather loads of positive energy for the weekend. As Memo says - we don´t need to care about what opinions there are. We´ll see how it goes.

Also, I heard a few people were shocked Sophia has ear rings.
Yes, I totally agree with you. It shouldn´t be done at birth, but when the child can choose itself - it was not my decision to put those.
Now, there are many cultural and religious differences between me and Memo´s family. So that was a battle I choose to let pass.
In the end she´s not that damaged by it. For me, her growing up without being bombarded with religious propaganda is way more important.
I want her to know that the good things that happens in her life are done by her, or people that love her - not god. Also, that she needs to stand up for the bad things she´s done.

Puss

Life cont.

Wow, how fast time passes.

As I talked with my mom, AK and Vincent on skype today I started thinking that it wasn´t that long ago they were here. It feels like forever, but if I think about the time I´ve had with Sophia it´s almost nothing.

When I am home with her, which I am practically 24/7, I don´t really think of her as a baby. I don´t know. We talk, dance, sing.

I am tired today. I guess 2 and a half months without a day "off" makes you tired. Sometimes I wish Memo could help out a bit with her. But with work (away from 6-15) and school (homework 16-18.30, school 19-22) there´s not much time for that.
Oh well, when he´s done with his masters (in 2 years), then I will be able to say that I worked fucking hard, and (hopefully) made a good job.

Only thing missing is a bit of company. Memo doesn´t really have time for spending time with us during the weeks (except for eating). Kinda wish I was back in Sweden.
We´ll see how long time I can do this.
24/7 without any breaks, no company, nothing to do (don´t have a car, nor is this a too exciting city).

at the moment all is good

This is Sophia and I trying to take a picture to send to Memo.

1st try: Her cheeks looked too big

2nd try: She´s staring at the juice

3d try: She looks surprised because she pooped

4th try: The poop festival continued

Puss

New week

We´re already half way through the new week.
I´ve kept busy.
Nothing special really.

Cleaning on Monday. Working out yesterday - not bad eh.
Went to the park for a 5km power walk. I was red and wet.
Talking a power walk, with a baby and stroller, at noon in Mexico in March is stupid.
It was WARM and Sunny. Felt like above 30c and my brain was boiling.
Sophia slept through it all. Good, I didn´t want anyone I know to see me like that.

Anywho, the weekend turned out to be busy.
On saturday we went to the doctor: 5.5kg and 58cm (3.4kg, 51cm when she was born).
She´s growing fast.

Other than that I have done some research for all you Mexicans - or other people who do not know what they are talking about:

* Babies under a year old have hick ups all the time and it does NOT mean they are cold. It could be because of getting air out after eating OR because of a sudden drop in temperature (could be from 30c - 25c, still NOT cold)

* Over dressing babies the way they do here in Mexico is not only uncomfortable for the baby but also DANGEROUS. It increases the risk for sids. Most importantly, above 23c the baby doesn´t really need additional layers to us. If you feel warm in shorts and a t-shirt in the summer - the baby is ok wearing only the diaper. Also, do not check if the baby is cold by touching hands or feet - they have bad circulation, so the belly or back is better.

Educate yourselves!
I am tired of EVERYTIME I meet someone (in Mexico) over 35 they either ask if the baby isn´t cold, or touch Sophia to check that she isn´t. COME ON - it´s super fucking warm.
This happens without exception
So women out there, do NOT listen to the elderly (mothers, grandmothers, mother in laws) they are MOSTLY wrong.
I am glad my mom is educated (a kindergarten teacher), and knows how to take care of babies - she lets me know that I am doing alright!
It´s well needed since after having to hear that I do it wrong more or less every time I meet someone other than Memo and the pediatrician I feel pretty alone in wanting to raise my daughter properly.

Puss

Friday

Fridays are just like any other day when you have a baby.
She still poops and she still eats - resists sleeping.
Why do baby´s resist sleep by the way? Is it because they have not yet learnt that sleeping is one of the best things with life (up there competing with wine)?
I mean, and the methods she uses not to fall asleep are cruel. Scratching her eyes - literary inside the eye. Pulling her hair. Seriously, come on.

By the way - all you people who posted that viral video: Kony 2012, did you do any research what so ever before?

Well, here it´s done for you:

1: http://www.expressen.se/nyheter/filmen-om-joseph-kony-far-hard-kritik/
    Swedish newspaper. Highlights;
  
    *Invisible Children (a lobby group) wants the americans to continue helping the Ugandan army - that is their goal.
    *The Ugandan army are no angels and have broken the human rights
    *The movie makes it sounds like an army built up by 30 000 children. Actually, the army consists of about 400 persons - majority adults. The number 30 000  is over 30 year.
    * The army no longer operates in Uganda, but in the Democratic Republic of Kongo, South Sudan, in Small groups.
    * The Ugandan army no longer see the army as a threat in the region since it´s so small.
Best of
    * A Norwegian researcher on the conflict in Uganda - "the concept and spreading of the movie shows an extreme low level of education among people". Haha, I love it!

2. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/09/kony-2012-video-criticism-uganda_n_1334549.html?ref=world

3. http://www.cnn.com/2012/03/09/world/africa/uganda-viral-video/index.html
 Best of
"It is the right message but it's 15 years too late, " said Col. Felix Kulayige, a Ugandan military spokesman. "If people cared 15 years ago, then thousands of lives would have been saved and thousands of children would have stayed at home and not been kidnapped."


Anywho, open your eyes, look around - see the whole story, not just the fancy youtube video.
Yes, help the children and catch Kony, but I mean - I am sure you can find badly treated children in your area, go help them instead of clicking share on an iffy movie.


Peace (;

 

Post Vaccines

The day after her first (not true) vaccines.
The night was a bit iffy in the end - maybe the fever started coming.
She´s been a bit cranky all day, and is now playing with her friends the farm animals - I am resting.
Got a bad headache.

Today is Womens day - I am 100% sure Memo has forgotten (; Oh well... Sophia and I will celebrate in the afternoon.

Here are some pictures from our amazing photo shoot this morning (read with sarcasm)

Puss

Vaccines

Just came back from vaccinations - pobrecita
She didnt cry much thou - lets hope there wont be any fever.
I feel so bad today that after he bath I put on her PJs- today is pyjama day

now

I also found this picture that I took on the 18th of January

Puss

Work Out

Yo! (;

As the title might hint - I have started "working out".
Those of you who know me know that I usually do not believe in working out.
But I think recovering from a pregnancy (I gained 20kg) needs a good work out.
The 20 kgs I gained were mostly baby and water I retained - so the kilos were gone within about 2 weeks - I could wear my old jeans within 4 days and really don´t think I need to loose any more weight, it´s mostly a question about toning.

I have done my research and know that sit ups are a big no no after a pregnancy (since the abs are separated, it does more damage than good) - I take my walks and do "plankan" (the plank?) 3*max and some other invented exercise to work my thighs and ass.

Since Little Miss Sunshine does not like to nap by herself -  I have done the exercises about 3 times since I started (2 weeks ago) so I do not see any result yet - with time (and more intense work out).

The goal:

Later - Puss

Birthday

Today it´s Sophia´s second birthday - month that is.
She´s a big girl now!

here the little lady is



puss

Citizenship

I forgot to write about something HUGE
Sophia is officially Mexican.

Fingerprints were taken, and Memo and I were super proud. Not that she did anything in particular, but still.

On thursday we´re getting her a passport, cus on April 4th the whole family is heading to Panama! yay I will be headig back to Gdl on the 20th

btw tomorrow she turns 2 months!

Puss

Fin de Semana

The weekend was nice.

Memo´s brother Jorge came on a surprise visit - so we have been pretty busy.
Tlaquepaque (finally), Andares (*3), Lunches etc.
Sophia was happy - was carried around in the gift Jorge and Alexia bought us BY Jorge himself.
Not bad.

I really liked Tlaquepaque - it was beautiful. I wish I would have brought my mom there. Next time.

At the moment Little Miss Sunshine is having a blast in the baby gym - kicking, speaking, making noise.

Enjoy the week

Short update

time for class again

Short update

it's been a long day. sophia wanted to wake up already at 6, but luckly fell back asleep until 10.30! at the moment she's talking to her friends the farm animals. puss